Coaching Series: Impactful Communication

Coaching Series: Impactful Communication Video Clips. Duration : 55.67 Mins.

Google Tech Talks January, 30 2008 ABSTRACT Greg Gillis and Lesly Higgins, experienced corporate coaches, will discuss and demonstrate various methods to effectively communicate; whether it is delivering a yearly review to a fellow Googler, developing your group's strategic vision, or influencing others towards an idea. By learning about Advocacy and Inquiry, Appreciate Inquiry, and Effective Feedback/Feedforward, you will come away from this workshop with concrete examples and experiences to help you get your message across with impact. Speaker: Lesly Higgins I've been coaching since 1999. After my first career in software development, with roles that included VP Software Engineering at Commerce One and VP Information Technology at Charles Schwab, I returned to school to complete an MS in Organizational Behavior and Development and also a comprehensive coaching program. I've coached at all levels in organizations, most functions, and with both early stage and Fortune 500 companies. Most of my clients are in the tech space, and they include: Agile Software, America Online, Apple Computer, Autodesk, Charles Schwab, Coremetrics, CNET, Google, Hewlett-Packard, Peoplesoft, Pixar, SAP, Shutterfly, Taleo, TiVo, and Wilson Sonsini Goodrich & Rosati. I believe everyone wants to be more effective and more fulfilled in life. Usually we don't know HOW to achieve that. And often we don't know what skills are important to develop to increase our overall effectiveness and satisfaction ...

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Leadership Through Effective Interpersonal Communication Skills

Too often I see leaders who either don't communicate; over communicate; communicate inappropriately through outbursts, anger, or blaming; or don't communicate clearly.

Communicating effectively through strong interpersonal communication is the most critical skill a leader can possess when working with others and it continues to be of great importance to meet the demands of employee retention and in the building of trust and confidence in an individual's and organization's leadership.

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Many leaders miss the mark when it comes to connecting with their followers due to a lack of interest in others ideas and opinions, out dated management styles, and the inability to work with others. The ability to listen, read body language, ask questions, provide feedback and generate effective two-way communication builds trust & can also prevent performance problems/challenges down the road. Great leaders consistently strive to strengthen their interpersonal communication competencies by building and maintaining open, supportive, and collaborative relationships with others in the organization.

Leadership Through Effective Interpersonal Communication Skills

So what are Interpersonal Communication Skills?

Interpersonal communication is the process of developing a unique relationship with the other person by interacting and simultaneously sharing influence. It involves using communication skills effectively. As well as using skills such as active listening and tone of voice, they include delegation and leadership. It is how well you communicate with someone.

Having good interpersonal communication skill is a combination of being able to say what you mean clearly and concisely, and being able to take on board opinions of others and adapt what you say accordingly, as well as making them feel they can speak freely. To do that, you've got to be aware of your own role in the conversation and be able to manage your own attitudes and emotions (emotional intelligence). People with good interpersonal skills can generally control the feelings that emerge in difficult situations and respond appropriately, instead of being overwhelmed by emotion, and therefore the number of conflicts is reduced.

Working to strengthen your interpersonal communication skills will enhance your ability as a leader to articulate the vision of your organization. It will ultimately strengthen and add value to the individual, team and organization at all levels.

Start enhancing your Interpersonal Communication Skills today.

Leadership Through Effective Interpersonal Communication Skills

Top Ten Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills

1) Listen without judgment. The key to good communication is listening well. Save your judging for later after you have heard and understood what was said.

2) Listen with the willingness to be swayed to the other person's opinion. No obligation to actually being swayed, but stay open to the option.

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3) Listen without thinking about what you will say next. Take time before you respond.

Top Ten Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills

4) Do not be invested in being right. Being right is not the point. If you must be right, you are not able to listen nor communicate because you have set up a barrier already. If you are always right that means the other person is always wrong. That cannot be true.

5) If your mind wanders, ask for repetition. We all are subject to distraction. Try to stay focused.

6) In all cases repeat back what you heard and ask if it is correct.

7) Listen to yourself. Find quiet moments and pay attention to what you are hearing from yourself. Does your body tighten up about certain issues. Body language is not something to read only in other people.

8) Say it honestly, but with consideration for the listener's feelings. Be polite, respectful and sincere.

9) Understand and acknowledge that most things are not black or white, but somewhere in a gray area. Get comfortable with gray.

10) Have integrity and build trust. Don't say what you don't mean. Don't promise what you won't or can't fulfill. Follow through with any committments you make.

Good listening skills take practice. Specific coaching may be necessary if you find you have communication issues with your boss, colleagues, subordinates, partners or personal relationships.

Top Ten Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills

The Importance Of Listening In Communication

The importance of listening in communication is enormous. People often focus on their speaking ability believing that good speaking equals good communication. The ability to speak well is a necessary component to successful communication. The ability to listen is equally as important.

The importance of listening in communication is often well illustrated when we analyze our listening skills with those closest to us. In particular I am referring to our spouse, partner, children or friends. Pay attention to the everyday conversations we have with these people with whom we think we communicate well.

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Do you ever find yourself mindlessly saying "uh huh" when one of these folks is trying to tell you something only to have say just after "I'm sorry what did you say?" Have you been in a conversation with one of them and you are not really listening completely to what they have to say because you are too busy formulating your response?

The Importance Of Listening In Communication

This is actually quite common and yet we think we are good communicators. In order to communicate effectively we have to be able to hear what the other person is saying. Not just hear because the acoustics are good or because the other person is speaking in a loud enough tone. It is important that we hear what the person is saying because we have taken the time to actively listen.

Listening takes work and when it comes to improving our communication there is no getting around that. When we are listening to music or watching T.V. we can certainly let our minds wander. If we want our communication skills to get stronger it is important that we not day dream in a conversation but instead concentrate fully on what the other person is saying.

No doubt this can be difficult. Not every conversation we are in is particularly interesting. If however, we want to improve these skills focus is important even when dealing with younger children and teenagers.

Allowing the person to completely finish their thought before you begin to form a response is also crucial to good listening. To take it even one step further wait a moment before you begin to reply. This gives the other person a chance to add anything else they may have thought of. By waiting an additional moment before you reply you also let the other person know they have been heard completely. If you practice this for a time people will relax when conversing with you because they will know that they don't have to rush to get their two cents in. They will appreciate the fact that they can communicate with you and be heard.

When having those important conversations with the people closest to you, try taking it one step further and repeating back what they said "what I heard you say is you are uncomfortable..." By doing this you give the other person the opportunity to correct any misconceptions that may have occurred or to clarify any points they were trying to make. This heightens the level of communication you are enjoying. And the person you are communicating with will certainly feel respected and important given the care you are taking with the conversation.

The technique of repeating back for clarity had been extremely useful when I have had conversations with my teenagers. It also comes in handy when speaking with a spouse or partner. Often times in those situations we begin to assume we know what the other person means. Allowing them to express themselves completely actually allows for greater intimacy, something we often desire in our relationships but wonder why we are not achieving.

The importance of listening in communication is something worthwhile to consider. Good listeners are often some of the best speakers because they have taken the time to find out what people are truly interested in. If you understand what is important to people than you understand how to reach them.

The strategies I spoke about are just as effective in the workplace especially in sales. If you are really listening to what your customer wants it will be that much easier to fulfill their needs. The customer will be impressed that you listened to what they were communicating instead of just going into sales mode. I have personally found in sales that the more I listened and the less I talked the better my sales ratio was and the more satisfied my clients were. That is a win-win situation for all involved.

The Importance Of Listening In Communication